Sunday, September 13, 2020

 

LIFE IS WORTH THE LIVING

About 5 years ago I had back pain, depression and suicidal thoughts. Insomnia prevailed. I would lie down to sleep but fear would overwhelm me: the fear that I may forget my wife's name, or that, if I did sleep, I may not wake up. I was diagnosed with West Nile virus by a doctor who prescribed a medication called Ambien and some other forms of rehabilitation which only made matters worse. I wanted to end it all and just go on as peacefully

as possible. But, thank God, that was not to be.

On a Sunday afternoon I drove down to the nearest lake to make my peace with God. I woke up in my sister-in-law's driveway, totally unaware of how I got there. The neighbors called the police and I was taken away in handcuffs, carried to jail and locked up. At my trial I was convicted of driving under the influence of prescription drugs.
This greatest trial of my life lasted about four months. Breakthrough finally came in the latter part of January. My suffering had begun labor day weekend the previous year.
I was on two medications and very slowly getting my strength back My family spent many hours in prayer for me and my wife stayed by my side praying desperately that our lives together might continue.  Strength from the Lord appeared. Life slowly became worth the living again, and, worth fighting for. Worshiping the god I had once served ran through my mind again. Finally I felt I had purpose again. I could pick up my guitar and praise the one who loved me from the beginning. I began thanking him daily for what He had brought me through. It wasn't easy and I didn't understand why it happened, but I became determined to give Him glory in each day going forward.
Pastor, last week you asked me how I got here. The spirit of God who brought me through my trial also opened the door for me to lead worship in your church. Now you have your answer. I learned through this trial that our battle is not easy but the life that comes after it is won makes it worth our fighting it.

Your brother Duane

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