All you gun-ownin' Christians, you know that ain't spiritual. You're not pendin' on God. You should be the first on the publicly published gun owner's list. We should tell everybody who and where you are, so everyone will know where all the armed hypocrites live (bet you ride Harleys too)!
We might have also missed these few encouraging thoughts:
1 According to one source there are more people killed with hammers each year than with guns. Solution: outlaw hammers. Another option: publicly publish a hammer owner's list!
2 A poor criminal has it tough in America. Lots of problems; and, one of the greatest problems is that he doesn't know what is behind which door. A public gun owners' list would help ease his mind. If he needs a gun he knows which house to catch empty. If he just wants to steal a little something, he will know which house is unarmed. Come on people. Lighten up on the poor guy. Publish the list!
3 Someone made inquiry as to how many crimes involving guns are committed by those having a valid weapons permit. The result: almost none. Please don't repeat that fact. That could have a very negative effect on the case for banning guns for legitimate owners!
4 In case you didn't read it, here is an article I wrote some time ago (this is not SATIRE, this actually happened):
BARS OR ARMS?
There is a South American country that is home to a small population of relatively poor, yet very peaceful people. However, for all their material lack and their peaceful nature, most all their buildings do afford iron bars which cover every opening, for among them dwell those that are not so kind and not so gentle.
Being as easy prey, all those that have the bars on their houses retreat behind them when they sleep. There are predators about, especially at night. But too often even the iron is not enough to protect their homes from invasion. Their few precious possessions are taken and family members die.
It was Sunday evening, February 17, 2008. Twenty armed men came in boats to Bartica, a small isolated town on the Essequibo River in Guyana, South America. Church was just dismissing. The day was spent and most everyone was walking home. The first doors entered were at the police station and the first to die were the three policemen. After that it was easy taking and killing till the lust for looting and bloodletting was satisfied. Nine more townspeople were dead. And, this was the second such incident in that country in just a few weeks.
But these massacres were not entirely unusual. Neither is it all that strange there for families to lose members to bandits who break into their homes. Actually, these folks are forced to accept all this as part of their everyday lives, for they live in a country where the citizens have no right to bear arms.